November 10, 2023

Today, I continued the 'Embodied Conversation' series by delving into the realm of self-portraiture. Being both the artist and the subject creates a unique and introspective experience, distinct from capturing another person. When photographing myself, a desire often arises to strip away external elements, leaving me bare. It allows me to get in touch with my presence within and without.

There exists a profound intimacy and proximity with oneself, a connection that is easy to overlook. Deep down, I sense the presence of someone waiting for me. Yet, in these creative sessions, I am reminded that I am the one awaiting myself. I’m always so eager and tender in the anticipation of this self-meeting.

I transformed my kitchen into a makeshift studio. I was standing in front of a big window giving to my back garden. It is untouched and wild like a jungle and served as a source of illumination. I refrain from controlling its growth, finding liberation and empowerment in allowing it to flourish. Today I was witnessed by this lush creature while exploring my own presence and image. A thin layer of glass separated me from the garden, and it became symbolic of the various unseen barriers isolating me from other realities – the veils shrouding my eyes, hindering a clear view of my own soul.

Photography, for me, is a magical elixir. Through the lens, I can visualize and release what’s held within my own body. And even when I don't look through the lens, when I am in front of it I know it's there for me and it serves as a portal helping me to access the creative energy. To access my power. It becomes a medium through which I invite my body to narrate its story, and in return, I listen. Once I listen to my body, I hear a soft duet start to sing. My body uplifts my little wild soul, and they tune into each other, singing in perfect unison. This is the moment when I feel aligned, free, and true to myself.

If someone asked what I need to feel grounded, fulfilled and on my path, I’d say explorative moments like these. They have no rules, no restrictions, no plan. In moments like these I chart my own path in my own strange ways, I discover my world. I embody my thoughts and sensitivity. I awaken a wild creature in me. I'm taking a chance to know myself better.

Showing up to create felt like honey today, again…